Coming from a ‘working class’ background and raising ‘middle-class’ children has been one of the most insightful experiences of my life. It has also significantly shifted my views on social mobility…
I used to think that educational attainment was the silver bullet that could shift the dial and that closing the attainment gap would therefore solve the social mobility issue we have in the UK. But having seen the journey of my eldest daughter so far, I am no longer as hopeful.
The opportunities that having access to knowledge and resources can provide is simply unmatched. Especially when combined with the drive that ‘middle-class’ parents have to develop their children. This is evident in the data on outcomes.
Here are a few examples to give you a flavour of these experiences and opportunities:
- My 7-year-old daughter has performed in front of large crowds and visited other countries. I’m told she has her own sense of ‘style’.
- Every morning she wakes up and sees her dad reading a book or writing in the living room. I tell her I’m still at school and she now joins me with a book of her own.
- Everyday at the school gates I tell her – ‘the rich scent of chicken wafted down the tunnel’. This is a line from Road Dahl’s Fantastic Mr Fox. It means that she needs to put the most effort possible into everything she does at school. We don’t like boring sentences.
- Sometimes we jump in the car and go on day-trips to places like Brighton or Cambridge.
- She tells me she wants to go to Oxford University because that’s where all the prime ministers have studied.
- She has a better laptop in primary school than I had at University.
- This week she went to see her Violin teacher play in her orchestra.
- When we recap the day at the dinner table she has the opportunity to articulate her experiences and feelings. She then listens and has the opportunity to engage in a discussion with me and my wife over an interesting topic – usually politics, religion, career, etc.
- As I tuck her in at night we recite chapters from the Quran in Arabic that she learns from her online tutor in Morocco.
- We finish the day practising gratitude and thanking God for the things we have in our lives.
This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to child development. The opportunities provided by this type of journey simply won’t be within reach for a lot of working-class families. Just as they weren’t for my family growing up.
This isn’t to say that working-class parents can’t do a great job. Many do, including my parents. They simply don’t have access to the knowledge, resources and network to provide certain opportunities. Some schools do a great job of bridging this gap, but the task is huge.
The grades you get in school are just one part of the picture. They are a prerequisite for being allowed to step on the door mat. The years of unequal development that are reflected in your thoughts, behaviours and words are what get you through the door and up the stairs…